For Sllaacs

While the search continues for Raiders Special Teamer Marquis Cooper, finally getting a chance to answer Sllaacs' request to do a post on Alex Smith.

Hey Mikey - 21' center console fishing boat in 6-10' waves?

I guess if Matt Maiocco can do a post on Tom Cable, I can lob something out there on Alex Smith. So I see that while Alex Smith is on his honeymoon, he's been asked to take a pay cut. Still doubtful that this will bring him under the line for Obama's tax increases, but might keep him from adding to the unemployment numbers.

All this Hill-Smith talk reminds me that I watched an NFL Network special on the top 10 QB controversies of all time. Montana-Young ran away with that one. And the other special they showed was top 10 controversial calls of all time. The Raiders were involved in 4 of them. I guess the only question was going to be which is #2 and which is #1:

#2 - Tuck Rule
#1 - Immaculate Reception

But this special was far more satisfying than the last I watched on the Tuck Rule. Jon Ritchie, one of the more intelligent dudes ever to play in the NFL, pointed out several of my favorite anti-Tuck Rule arguments, including the question of how the rule can apply when Brady's left hand touched the ball before he fumbled, and wondering why all QBs don't just run around pump faking and never bringing the ball fully back to their bodies because they would be immune from fumbling. Excellent.

Unfortunately, I've just mentioned the Immaculate Reception on Unk's birthday. Oops! I'm sure Unk could provide a dissertation on Frenchy Fuqua, trapping the ball, and referees consulting with stadium security before ever making the TD call.

Happy Birthday, Unk!

A word about JASR - And then the picks.

Now that the Main Stream Media have made the connection, I would like to reinforce my own stance on JaAlex SmiRussell - or JASR, for short. Sllaacs feels no satisfaction in this, only a slight vindication, for Alex Smith.

Alex Smith has been correctly labelled a BUST, but that label should have an asterisk, that says: "The San Francisco Forty-Niners totally messed up this kids' career, see 'Nolan, Mike' for further details."

The same can be said JASR - he is a victim of a crummy owner, coaching staff and team, and much like Alex Smith - he is no Archie Manning. He needs some semblance of a coaching staff and supporting cast on his team for him to succeed. There is nothing wrong with JASR physically; he can make all the plays, but he must be properly guided in how to be a QB. In the old days, JASR and Alex Smith would have sat the bench for at least one full season and carried a clipboard while a veteran QB showed him how it was done. The success of Peyton Manning and a few other great QB's coming right in and starting, along with media pressure due to the Number One Overall Pick status of both JaMarcus and Alex, led two weak ownership's to rush the young players into games, before any kind of team stability or structure had been achieved. When I see JASR, I just feel sad, and I feel a slight vindication for Alex, because the same thing that happened to him, has happened to JASR. Now, all the Raiders fans need is for Cable to call JASR a pussy and JASR to go into a game and injure himself further. Then he and Alex will be damn-near twins. The Ebony and Ivory Quarterbacks, underneath the heading: Ruined #1 Overall Picks by Bay Area NFL teams.

What should irk Raiders fans the most: Didn't Big Al take at least one look across the Bay over the last 4 years and get a smidgen of an idea of the horrible job Nolan and the Yorks were doing with Alex Smith? Guess not, since he's doing nearly the exact same thing with JASR. Or at least, allowing it to happen.

Picks:

San Franciso @ Miami:

The Dolphins are good. Better than Buffalo? Yes. Better than the Bretts? I don't know. Better than the Forty-Niners? The Mike Singletary-led Forty-Niners? Probably. But I am going to go with my squad this week, hoping not to jinx them. They went to New York and won, so I will pick the Forty-Niners to go into Florida now and come back with another win. San Francisco over the Dolphins 17-10.

New England @ Oakland:

The Raiders will lose this one. Why, you might ask, am I so sure? Because the Raiders are Blue Shit Water, that's why. But more than that, the Raider ALWAYS FOLD IN BIG GAMES. And this is a big game - for Randy Moss. He wants to come in and go off on the Raiders. And he will. Nmandi is quite the baller, and even if he does shut down Moss, Randy will be leaving with the win and the thought that success in the playoffs is a realistic goal. New England over the Raiders, 38-22.

Green Bay @ Jacksonville:

Who would have thought, after week 8 that the Niners would be challenging the Packers for "Better Record". Quite the tumble for the Cheese Heads. They went from: "We Need Favre!" to: "We got Rodgers!" to: "Who are we gonna draft next year?"  Expect the Packers to keep losing. The Jacksonville Jaguars will beat Green Bay 23-16, in a "Depresser".

N.Y. Giants @ Dallas:

This is the only compelling game of the week, in Sllaacs opinion. Should be a good game, with N.Y. having the shine slapped off their asses by McNabb and Co. and Pittsburgh callin' it a comeback against Dallas last week, even though they been here for years, rocking their peers, putting suckers in fear - making their tears rain down like a mon-soon... But I digress, (Go L.L, go L.L!). N.Y. will slap down Romo and T.O. Giants over Cowboys, 27-17.

"...don't ever compare me to rest who are all being sliced and diced..."

P.S.  You gotta love LL Cool J.  "Momma said knock you out", but she also said "Todd, take out the garbage."

Sllaacs

Good Thing We Made a Coaching Change

Seriously. It's much less stressful to just flat-out suck, a-la the Rams or the Lions, than it is to play really well for 3 1/2 quarters and then suck for 12 minutes and lose by a field goal or a touchdown. It's much easier, as a fan, to uncompetitive, to just get flat out smashed, 34-3. It's much easier for me to watch us get outgained 422-226 in total offense. To lose the turnover battle 2-0. I hated the heart-attack nature of the last two games.

Can we learn anything about the Tom Cable regime, other than he spent three hours shouting "Shut the fuck up, Donny!" into his headset? Al's team still sucks, if possible even worse than before. No pass rush, missed tackles. I guess the penalties were better, but the receivers can't get open, and when they do they either drop the ball or JaMarcus overthrows them.

I got a text from Sllaacs saying, "JaAlex SmiRussell," implying that we've got a bust on our hands as big as the one with all that Natural Talent sitting on the 49ers sideline. And a text from Dan advising me that Kristy has taken to screaming "YOU SUCK" at JaMarcus every time he drops back to pass.

At this point, I'm so discouraged, I'll believe anything.