Replacement Officials and the NFL: Amazing, Lame, Epic Failures.

What a game yesterday.  I understand that NFL is in business negotiations right now, and using Scab Officials is necessary to teach the regular officials to bow down.  Screws the fans though, and if you hear/see some player quotes from the Green Bay Packers - then you know that some players feel screwed also.  Our own President weighed in on it - and you would think he would be able at some point to spur these NFL assholes into giving the Officials some damn Vacation Time and some fucking health benefits.

The NFL will simply deal with this for now, maybe in the hopes that the Replacements will learn under fire and in 3 - 4 weeks some will be ready to permanently replace some of the dudes on strike.  That happens (Replacements being kept) and all of a sudden the League will have a watered-down fraternity of Officials and a better bargaining position.

I feel for Green Bay, but they're the one's that coughed up 8 sacks in the first half and only led Seattle by 5 measly ass points at the end of the game.    I mean damn, the Pack had the ball with 2 minutes left and the lead, then tried to fumble the ball away on first down. Failing at that, they ended up punting from their own 5.  They reaped what they sowed - even though anyone and everyone with eyeballs that are functional could tell that TD "catch" was total bullshit. It was an interception.

And of course the replay decision was faulty.  Much like the "Tuck Rule", unheard of until the Raiders played the Patriots in the the AFC Championship - yesterday, a blatant pass interference call cannot be overturned by replay - even though the NFL replays and reviews ALL Touchdowns - and the receiver get's a reception because it was simultaneously caught.  What?  WTF?  The freaking wide receiver (Golden Tate - "Golden"?  Really?) was draped over the back of the DB (M.D. Jennings) who clearly intercepted the damn ball. 

Back in the day the Raiders got robbed - nay:  assraped in a Championship game (and that call was made by "Real Officials")  - so regular season game 3 doesn't quite hold the same signifigance, but the absurdity of the calls are quite similar - replacement officials or not - because the NFL is backing both of those horribly shitty calls.  Amazing.

I love how one official signalled Touch Back and the other signalled Touchdown - and they went the TD signalling asshole 10 mother-loving minutes later.  They had to drag 11 Green Bay players back out onto the field to defend the extra point.  Lame. 

I like how the NFL was like: "Uh, Yeah...  Call was messed up, they should have called P.I., but they didn't and so that was a simultaneous catch, so yeah...  TD.  Suck it Packers".  Epic Fail.


Sllaacs

Early Pre-game

The coffee is on for today's home tailgate. A slightly different scene from last week's attendance at the NFL's ninth-ranked tailgate. And for some reason I'm watching one of those newfangled pop stars sing "God Save the Queen" instead of SeaBass warm up with 76-yard FGs. Thankfully they've cut over from Wembley just in time to see a pretty lame JLH opening return. And here comes JaMarcus.

Regarding that tailgate ranking, why in the world is the Green Bay tailgate ranked behind Buffalo's? Green Bay's is ahead at every level of ranking. Clearly, there is some algorithm by which length of tailgate factors into these rankings. Why would you want to attend an inferior tailgate longer? Dobolina, can you explain?

So far it's Ryan-1 Ryan-1 in Baltimore. Kwame looking Kwamish being blown by early for a sack. And Michael Huff is back in center field making a nice play to help Hall break up a deep throw.

Oh no...why did JaMarcus concede that safety? With these Tackles, he has to learn to get rid of the ball faster.

Sllaacs Picks - Week 3 - Aaron Rodgers Arm, John Kitna's Head, JaMarcus Russells' Arm and Head

So I took the arm of John Kitna over the arm of Aaron Rodgers.  Looked OK up until the fourth quarter.  So with info from that game last week filed away in the old Brain Box, I submit my picks: 

Dallas @ Green Bay.  I think the popular pick would be to take the Packers at home in this game, but I will take Dallas for the simple fact that they are the better team, and have the best receiver in the NFL - Terrell Owens.  30-17, Cowboys win.

Raiders @ Buffalo.  The Bills are 2-0 against bad teams (Seattle and Jacksonville), but their defense looked good in both games.  Despite the victory over the horrible Chiefs last week, and the wonderful distraction that is RAIDER MANAGEMENT, Oakland will get blown out in N.Y. to the tune of 28-12, Bills win. I think we can look for more Alex Smith-like numbers from J. Russell in this game, and more blame on the receivers.  

Let's just watch when, how and where JaMarcus delivers the ball on each pass attempt and ask ourselves how many Hall of Famers Brett Favre has thrown to over his career.  Here is a short list* of some of Favre's most notable receivers:

TD's

Antonio Freeman 57

Sterling Sharpe  41 

Donald Driver  36

Robert Brooks   32

Bubba Franks  29

JAVON WALKER   19

Mark Chmura   16

Dorsey Levens   16

Greg Jennings 14

William Henderson 13

Keith Jackson   11

Edgar Bennett  10

Don Beebe 4

Mark Clayton 3

Andre Rison   1

 

*the above is an Arbitrary Listing, for complete stats, CLICK HERE.

In the end, it's all about the Quarterback.  David Carr has a career 59.7 completion pct. and led the NFL in 2006, before being relegated to the bench last year in Carolina - largely due to mobility "problems", read; shitty Offensive Lines.  Who was he throwing to when he was with the Texans?  Exactly.

Detroit @ San Francisco.  Here is one game the Niners SHOULD win, (Might be a long while before you read that type of statement regarding SF in this blog again).  The Lions gave up 34 points to the woeful Dirty Birds, then gave up 48 to the Pack, ( That latter game being blown out of proportion a bit since Kitna went nuts with the throwing of the picks).  Point is, Offensively or Defensively the Lions have a 50-year history of giving up points to opponents at a rate that stunts the hell out the teams' annual efforts for success.  Right now in Detroit, you already got receivers bitching about Martz being fired and the Lions running too much.  

No matter how often we bitch about the current state of our teams in the Bay Area, at least we're not living in Michigan.  In short; the Lions sucked, suck and will suck some more.  

Niners win, 35-17.

P.S. Heard a rumor on KNBR 680 AM (SF):  Kiffin won't be fired until the Raiders lose one.  So, this Monday, 6am Eastern Time?

Sllaacs

Dan's Championship Picks

As long as we are quoting our wives, here's a gem from Kristy about 2 minutes ago as I wrapped up dinner: "Why don't you go blog, and I'll clean up the kitchen." No sarcasm whatsoever. Awesome.

"Poop stuck to the roof of my mouth" is the perfect analogy for tomorrow's early game. Could there be two more unlikable quarterbacks squaring off than Rivers and Brady? A Southern-cocky blowhard vs. a smug perfectionist prick. The game also features the two highest profile active players to drag the NFL into the performance enhancing drug mess in Harrison and Merriman. For a Raiders fan, watching Restraining Order Randy and the Tuckers take on Turner adds an element of pain. And I haven't even gotten to the cheating scandal. At least there is drama. I have always found LaDainian Tomlinson unobjectionable, even while pulling run-catch-pass TD trifectas twice a year against the Raiders. Last year's Marty meltdown made L(D)T even more interesting as he basically compared Belichick to school in the summertime. I love it. The Patriots' squeaky clean Bob Kraft image is the biggest joke in sports.

But the Patriots will win. It is going to be an interesting, physical, and ultimately maddening game. In addition to the fact that they are the team best suited to carry a nation's hatred of the Patriots on their backs, the one thing I like about the Chargers' chances is that they should be able to get to Brady. But a hobbled Rivers-to-Gates-based offense will slip up more often than the Patriots will be stopped. I like the 27-20 call, but for originality I am going to say it ends 30-21, and as the Patriots line up for the game-sealing FG, Tomlinson's head will explode along with 100,000 other Americans who can't handle another week's combination of Brady screaming ridiculous pep talks to his teammates and then smirking away the final 3 minutes of the game. For all the Montana comparisons, could you ever in a million years imagine Brady stepping into the huddle needing an epic drive to win the Super Bowl and cracking, "Hey - there's John Candy."

As for the late game, I am sure that Unk answered the above question about unlikable quarterbacks with a shout of, "Eli!" as he read it. But Eli is a Seinfeld fan, and that makes him ok in my book. Plus, the Chargers were a franchise uninterested in winning when Eli came out, which is probably why very few of the Raider fans I know hate them the way they hate the Chefs and Donkeys.

I grew up in Wisconsin. I'm biased. But Favre is unquestionably a likable quarterback. The guy has fun. He loves the game. He loves his teammates. And he's going to take the Packers to the Super Bowl this year. As I write this the temperature in Green Bay is -7. Tomorrow's TV-friendly evening kickoff might pass the 1993 Raiders game that I attended for the 2nd coldest game ever played at Lambeau Field. Unless the 13-mph wind forecast is a drastic underestimate, Favre will operate well with a heavy dose of Ryan Grant to back him.

Tomorrow I'll add as much Wisconsin insight as I can gather, but from my viewpoint the Packers will win 31-20 for the following reasons. The Giants have hobbled (Burress) or old (Toomer) WRs, and Shockey is gone. Woodson and Harris can man up, leaving Bigby free to cheat up and slow down the running game. If Bigby has even half the game he had against Seattle, the defense will be stout. Gotta love a guy named "Atari." To score on New York means limiting the pass rush. No team has a better quick-hitting pass game than the Packers, and with Grant's emergence and a diverse screen game, the Packers should be able to game plan for that. Look at what they did last week against Kerney and company.

If my picks are right, this could set up a personal disaster on par with Super Bowls XXXII and XXXVII when teams I absolutely hated (Broncos and Bucs) beat teams I love (Packers and Raiders). Oh yeah, I'll be on a plane.

There's Something About Mary Buckheit

Apparently she's never seen this movie. That's what I take from reading this column, anyway. I wanted to find the clip that actually had Brett Favre in it, but this is close enough. The only real difference between Brett Favre and Tony Romo is that Brett Favre is 67 years old and Chris Berman has a massive man-crush on him. Romo might show up in the tabloids, but he hasn't appeared in a major motion picture yet. And he hasn't had been to Betty Ford, either. And I can't help but think that if Brett had starred in a city with a population of more than 30,000 people, he would have been getting lap dances from insane former pop sensations, too.

I fully expect a rebuttal from Dan Hauenstein...