Thursday, December 10, 2009

Welcome Back, Randy, JaMarcus

This was going to be a strictly Randy Hanson post, with the theme song to "Welcome Back, Kotter."

I thought it would be appropriate because it's a cool song from a cool show, and because Al is from Brooklyn.

Anyway, Jerry Mac does a breakdown/speculation of why in the name of anything Randy Hanson could possibly be back working for the Raiders, concluding, rather pithily and quite brutally, "You want a successful business model, check with Fortune 500." To make the implication explicit, The Raiders do not have a successful business model as Al Davis has currently constructed it.

But while I was out picking my daughter up from school, JaMarcus addressed the media, so we give him a nice welcome back, kinda sorta. He promises that when he gets back on the field, we'll see a "Totally different JaMarcus." But he hasn't lost any weight or changed his work ethic. So there. And he's keeping his money.

Kawakami has a transcript. God doesn't make mistakes, and time will tell, and it's not the end of the world.

Finally, since we opened with Brooklyn, we can close with Brooklyn, too. Lowell Cohn talks to Ira Miller, who invents the verb "to Raider." Getting Raidered sounds an awful lot like getting debacled. Ira likes Gradkowski, at least in relation to JaMarcus. This exchange stood out to me, after Miller says that "Getting the No. 1 draft choice off the field certainly helped them:

Cohn: Which No. 1 draft choice?

Miller: Both of them - the quarterback and Heyward-Bey. I don't think Heyward-Bey has any chance. He's one of Al's fantasies -- he runs fast.

That's kind of the impression I get about DHB, too. I got into a discussion via twitter yesterday with the author of Raiders Blog, who is still optimistic that DHB will pan out once he learns to catch the ball, because he's a good kid, works hard, etc. And I agree that sure, he's a good kid, etc, and I feel bad about suggesting he jump off the Golden Gate Bridge. That was a joke in poor taste. But the point is, DHB is not a football player. He's a track star. We may as well have drafted Usain Bolt. And anyone who suggests the Randy Hanson issue is overblown, or is not a big deal, or not a red flag indicator that something is deeply, deeply diseased and rotten within the structure of the Raiders organization is deep, deep denial. They're like the wives who stayed with Tom Cable after he beat them.

Because at the very least, we should be able to enjoy the sweet taste of a rare victory for longer than two days before reminding everyone in the stupidest way possible of the dysfunction that is the team we love.

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