Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Adam Treu Breaks it Down.

Adam Treu sends a shout out to those of us obsessed with the glorious debacle that is the Oakland Raiders, gently urging us to back away from the ledge. (h/t Jerry.) Treu wants to ask ourselves these questions:
Have I wished the owner dead? Have I threatened to pummel Kiffin into a lifeless, bloody heap? Did I say if given the chance, I’d take a tube sock and a roll of nickels to Rob Ryan’s temple? Do I find myself surprised and/or disappointed by personal fouls and (alleged) DUI’s? Have I screamed at a player/fellow fan/family member/pet so violently I needed a Zoloft, a bourbon and my blankie?

I figured it would be fun to take them one by one:

Have I wished the owner dead? Yes. I'm not proud of it. I've also compared him to a woman in a persistent vegetative state.

Have I threatened to pummel Kiffin? No.

Tube Sock full of nickels to Ryan's temples? No, but that's a great image. And I wonder if it would work.

Surprised/disappointed by Personal Fouls/DUIs? No, and kind of. I think if you're surprised at these things from this group you're not really paying attention. Maybe that's the point.

Screamed at anyone so violently I need a Zoloft/bourbon/my blankie? I've screamed at the TV. And at a pet, but not because of the Raiders, but because they mess with skunks and/or are in general disgusting and disobedient.

But Treu's advice to find something else to love is well-taken. This is a freakshow. As Dan says, it's like learning to love the bomb in Dr. Strangelove. Let's blow it up.

6 comments:

Michael Hauenstein said...

http://haslanekiffinbeenfired.com/ was linked on deadspin today. Nicely done.

Sllaacs said...

The bomb is the Raiders? So who does the bomb rider represent, the typical Raider Fan?

Sllaacs said...

The bomb is the Raiders? So who does the bomb rider represent, the typical Raider Fan?

john said...

Nice Link. And yes. The Raiders are the bomb, or in your analogy the other day, the Hindenburg. Either way, it's going going down in spectacular flames.

Sllaacs said...

Hella funny analogy

Sllaacs said...

You know, the Raiders flames may be that of the Phoenix... Wait til next year.