Jeez, I Have to Make Picks?

Welcome back, Sllaacs.

For a week there I thought that I had been relieved of the pressure of coming up with a few witty things to say while taking wild guesses and putting together random pairs of numbers each week. No such luck, I guess. Unless I take the dobolina approach of picking once and then making occasional comments comparing JaMarcus Russell to one of the sorriest sacks of a Quarterback ever to try playing in the NFL. No, I'm not talking about Alex Smith.

Heyward-Bey vs. Crabtree watch: 0-0 after one week. Well, not in dollars or in being a complete douche bag.

Speaking of such unsavoryness, why is Mike Vick not eligible to play? And why did Johnny not pick the Saints-Eagles game? I am going with the Saints. This team scores like the Gannon-led Raiders. Sure, they played the Lions, but they'll put up points on everyone this year. Plus, I had a great time at Jazz Fest on my birthday in May. I highly recommend Jazz Fest as a must do in one's life. New Orleans 31-20.

On my refrigerator is a picture of my wife's grandfather sending out the Atlanta Falcons during introductions at Texas Stadium. I suspect there is a fancier system at the new stadium. Too much hoopla for the Giants to overcome. Dallas 24-21. Over-under on punts that hit the big screen: 2.

I believe in Mike Singletary. Frank Gore is on my fantasy football team (so is Randy Moss). Patrick Willis is the real deal. Yadda yadda yadda. Seattle is good this year and the 49ers are still trying. Home letdown at the Taxpayer-named 'Stick. Seattle 28-17.

I also believe that this is a dangerous game for the resurgent Raiders. Warren Sapp said, "Oakland plays worse when they have confidence." Unk has always said, "The Raiders play down to their competition." But, like Johnny, I'm in. I really want to see the Raiders roll into KC, pick up the intensity where they left it with about 2 minutes remaining in the San Diego game, and steamroll the Chefs. Raiders, 27-10.