"I'm in dispair"

This first quarter is some of the worst football I've ever seen the Raiders play.

We can't tackle.

We can't hit.

He can't rush.

We can't pass.

Watching the Raiders play today reminds me of a joke:

This guy is throwing a party. He wants the party to have a theme, but he wants to do something original, because he's been to way to many Pimp'n'Ho/Cowboy Up/Tart'n'Vicar/Toga parties. So he tells people to come dressed as an emotion. However they're feeling that day, that's how they should dress.

So the yellow coward is there, the green with envy person, the so-angry-I'm-Red guy is in the house. You've also got the depressed lady dressed in black.

After a while, the doorbell rings. The guy opens his door to see two men. One of them has a pear into which a hole has been cut and his thumb inserted. The other guy has his dick in a cup of tapioca pudding.

"Whoa, fellas," the host exclaims. "I don't know what you thought, but this is not that type of party. You're supposed to come dressed as an emotion."

"I'm in dispair," says the guy with his thumb in a pair.

And the pudding guy says, "And I'm fucking dis custard."